Sweet Farewell

Fergus Meeting

(The moment we met. I was video taping hundreds of blackbirds, singing their autumn farewell and heard a little peep behind me on the bridge…I told him if he followed me home, he could stay, but it was chilly, and he was so tiny, so I carried him bome, made a nest for him in the art room downstairs, and waited for Phillip to come home from school, hoping I could ease him into the idea of adding–at that time–a fifth cat to our household. Happily, Phillip was as quickly captivated as I had been. Forever.)

It seems our sweet Fergus has chosen this time of returning light to change worlds, so we’re setting aside almost everything else to be with this parting in our family. He found me, followed me home, made it clear he wasn’t leaving, took his profound place in our hearts, and will always rest in them.

Images don’t capture spirits, and his was sweetness and light, but with a core of steel. He’d been abandoned at birth, marked as feral and left outside his first year, which led to respiratory struggles he’s dealt with every year of his brief 10 years on Earth. He’s always felt like a fragile bird wrapped in downy fluff. He has been a brave and charming fellow who liked to rest in baskets, drawers, bags, chairs, with his siblings, and in our lives, and our letting go is all the harder for the grace and delight he’s blessed us with, and only left us craving more. We will grieve; we will adjust; we will miss him forever.

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18 thoughts on “Sweet Farewell

  1. Oh no, no no. I am so very sorry to hear this, how heart breaking. What an angel he was, how lucky that he found you, he wouldn’t have had any life if he hadn’t. How quickly those years have gone by, I remember when you found him. Huge hugs to you both, I know exactly how you are feeling, I’m sobbing and I’ve never met him.xxxxxxxxx

    1. Thank you for your immensely kind heart; the comfort of friends has been such a gift this week, and I love that you there at the beginning of our love affair with our darling Fergus. I know you are deeply acquainted with these losses, and also with the fact that enduring them is the possibility we face whenever we say yes to Love…and still, we will always say yes. xoxoxo Love you, dear one.

  2. What a beautiful tribute, Kitty. My eyes also filled up with tears. I have two special cats who will welcome him. Sylvester and Puddie Tat brought us much happiness. Their memories will always be there. Thanks for sharing Fergus with your readers. The photos are amazing. Peace to you both as you adjust.

    1. Thank you for sharing and offering such comforting words. They–and you–are deeply appreciated. Gentle peace and gratitude for your kindness, Diana.

  3. I know that feeling all too well. Though we have other beautiful, loving, funny creatures we share our lives with, no one can replace my Merlin. He was a very special animal indeed. I’d wanted a calico kitten forever, and when I went to inspect the cage of tiny mewling ones being given away at our local farm store, he crawled out and immediately into my lap…his blue-eyes and Siamese marking suggesting he might not actually be the calico he swore he was…

    1. Oh, how touching; yes, some of these little ones just seem to be on a mission to find “only” us, and to love us in ways that let us know we were absolutely, beyond any doubt, meant for each other. I hope Fergus knew on a cellular level that we felt the same about him. I always appreciate your kindness and depth, Cathy; thank you so much for these gifts, such a blessed balm when my heart is raw with grief.

  4. Sorry for the loss of such a dear member of your household. I’m so glad he adopted you and vice versa.

    1. We sure did, Maureen; we made homes in one another’s heart, and they will never be vacant. Thank you for your kindness and comforting words. Hope you are well and safe, and send you gentle peace.

  5. My heart is aching for you because we have felt this pain before and, because we love our four-leggeds, we will again. What a blessing you all have been to each other, what beautiful memories you made! Sharing your sadness.

    1. Thank you, Terry; yes, this is the pain we accept when we say yes to love…and, as I shared with my dear friend, we will continue to say yes. I hope your new little lifelight is doing well and blessing you both with her sweet energy. 🙂 Gentle peace and gratitude for your ever-sensitive heart, Terry.

  6. I am so sad you lost your fur baby. You can also rejoice that you gave a wonderful being a lovely life long life.

    1. Thank you, Kerry; this is so kind of you, and a very comforting thought. It was our utter honor to share a space of time and place with the sweet light of Fergus. Gentle peace to you, Kerry.

    1. Yes, I agree; no way round it and always too soon. Thank you for your eloquence and kindness; it’s so greatly appreciated when we’re seeking the path back to peace, Beate. Bless you, and gentle peace.

  7. Kitty, I am so sorry that Fergus has passed over. I know how heartbreaking it is, and he was such a lovely boy, waiting for you to come get him on that bridge. I am a firm believer that exactly the animals we are supposed to have are who come to us, and that there are no coincidences when it comes to them becoming little lights in out lives. What a real sweetheart he is – you can see it in each photo (thanks for finding and sharing them all.) What a lucky boy, and what a lucky you.

  8. What a kind and gentle response; your words are so very much appreciated, Jeanne. Thank you. ♥️ Yes, I always felt Fergus and I were destined to meet…it was kismet. ♥️

    Gentle Peace to your heart, Jeanne.

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